Humans are hard-wired for connection and most of us are motivated to find love in our lives.
You may have grown up with stories of happy endings and finding your one true love, yet somehow along the way a different story has become imprinted and this has become a roadblock to love for you, with no easy detour.
Bella Maree Lane is an international heart wound healer who has experienced firsthand the destructive effects of trauma and created a path to help herself and you to build happier healthier relationships.
“Without healing past trauma, you are destined to repeat the same mistakes over and over,” she explains. “Once you begin to heal you begin to think, feel, and behave in different ways, and who you attract completely changes. “
A self-professed romantic and an incurable optimist, the source of Bella Maree’s trauma is clearly written in her past. For some, she claims, the trauma story isn’t so obvious and can only be addressed by gently peeling back the layers, exposing it for what it is, and healing the deepest wounds.
“There is no detour around your pain. If you try and circumvent feeling it, you simply suppress it. If you refuse to feel it, you won’t heal it! You are wired to avoid pain so it’s natural not to want to relive painful experiences, but it is necessary because when heart wounds are left unhealed, they create unconscious, destructive life patterns,” she says.
Maya Angelou famously said, ‘I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.’
Trauma begins with how you felt in a certain situation, explains Bella Maree, whether the abuse was real or perceived. “For many of us it began with our families, childhood trauma that we buried because we didn’t know how to deal with it, it carries through to our early relationships and continues until we address the beliefs formed by trauma.”
“When you have an unhealed trauma, you see things through a particular lens and if you don’t heal the wound, you are highly likely to make the same choices and decisions that lead to painful outcomes. This is how people get stuck in destructive, repetitive life patterns. If you refuse to do the work, you will keep getting the same lesson presented until you finally understand,” she explains.
Navigating The Roadblocks To Happiness
Having spent decades studying various healing modalities whilst working to heal the traumatic scars left by her history of abuse and toxic relationships, Bella Maree is now a much sought-after therapist and relationship expert. She offers a range of group workshops and personalized programs that include ‘Emotional Freedom and Learning Love Therapy’, ‘Relationship Enrichment’, and ‘Conscious Intimacy’.
Through her courses and a growing community on social media, Bella Maree is both present and generous with her time. In her experience, it was not until she realized that she was never going to change the people she chose, until the healing process began to shed light on the ‘why’ behind her choices.
Bella says that most of us have experienced heartbreak and how we deal with it is very personal. Given that we are hardwired to avoid pain, most of us have declined the heart healing work necessary to recover and to learn to rebuild the trust that enables us to open to love again. “It’s natural for us to look outward to blame those arounds us but healing is an inward journey and so starts with you.”
The softly spoken healer points out that although much of her work revolves around building healthy relationships, she shies away from calling herself a dating guru. Although the feedback from those who have worked with her outlines transformative experiences; of falling in love again and forging deeper connections with partners,this is the by-product of her clients doing their inner work. She says the process is ultimately deeply personal.
“The journey to find love is the most fertile ground for your personal growth. The journey is full of twists and turns and knowing how to navigate these makes the experience positive regardless of the short-term outcome.”
There’s No Magic Wand
“People want a magic wand but real life does not work that way. In my experience, the universe brings us different people and experiences to show us where we still get triggered and our triggers expose the part of us that is not yet healed. This is the gold and gift inside all relationships.”
An Australian by birth, Bella Maree now resides in LA where she has built her practice. Covid created the opportunity to take much of her work online and build a community that she supports through online presentations and one-on-one sessions.
“The fish does not see the water that it swims in, much like likewise we have a limited ability to see ourselves clearly. That is why working with a practitioner is so helpful, they can see your entire landscape. Willingness to self-reflect is the key to transformation and healing,” she explains.
Your Traumas Become Your Shadow
“Your traumas become your shadow, they follow you everywhere from one relationship to the next. Each relationship may be different but the outcome will be the same, it’s like building a house on cracked foundations. Gaining perspective and awareness are the first steps to healing and ultimately lead to releasing us from our own destructive, debilitating patterns.”
Bella Maree Lane has banished the shadows in her own life and through her work, she helps her clients to find their way into the light, release the pain and fear they have held on to, and learn about what brings them joy.
Her site has become a valuable resource for those who recognize the repetitive patterns appearing in their lives and are willing to work through their pain. Bella Maree believes that healing the wounds of the heart and building a healthy relationship with yourself is the key to finding happiness in your life, regardless of whether that is with or without a partner.
The heart-wound therapist is now in her 6th decade and brings a lifetime of experience and healing to her work with clients. Once she found the key to her own happiness, it became her mission to help others. She recently started dating again after many years of personal work and the fact that she is optimistic about the future of her own relationships is a testament to the groundbreaking work she is doing.
Hardwood Staircase Flooring: Pros, Cons, and Benefits
In the world of home design and aesthetics, stairs play an important but often overlooked role. Unfortunately, many homeowners unknowingly underestimate the untapped potential of stairs as essential design elements. In addition to their practical purpose, stairs can be turned into elements that add elegance and style to a home. Among the various materials used for staircases, hardwood is consistently favoured and versatile. It not only emphasizes visual appeal but also provides practical benefits. In this article, we will take an in-depth look at hardwood flooring on stairs, exploring its many benefits, unique features, and essential factors that deserve close attention.
The Allure of Hardwood: 10 Resounding Reasons to Consider
Before we delve into the particularities that make hardwood a quintessential choice for staircases, it’s significant to preface that every material brings its own set of attributes to the table. However, hardwood stands out as an amalgamation of versatility, enduring grace, and pragmatic efficiency. In the following sections, we dissect the manifold reasons that could make hardwood the pièce de résistance of your home, synthesizing elegance and utility in a singular, memorable way.
1. The Intersection of Aesthetics and Practicality
The material you choose for your staircase isn’t just a matter of function; it’s a declaration of style. Hardwood, with its intrinsic elegance and an array of utilitarian benefits, delivers a package that’s hard to ignore or beat.
2. Refinishing: A Second Life
Think about your staircase as a long-term investment. Over time, the rigours of daily use will manifest in scuffs, dents, and general wear. Hardwood offers an elegant solution—refinishing. This process restores your staircase to its former glory, allowing for a sustainable approach to interior decor.
3. The Majesty of Grain Patterns
Hardwood is not a monolith. The unique grain patterns that distinguish one type of wood from another can add significant nuance to your staircase. They allow for a deeply customized aesthetic that can either complement your existing decor or serve as a contrast to create an entirely new design language within your home.
4. An Investment in Timelessness and Home Value
Hardwood’s timeless appeal is a well-established fact. What’s less discussed is how this quality can translate into a tangible financial benefit. A hardwood staircase can significantly elevate the overall value of your property, making it a wise investment for the future.
5. Maintenance Ease
In the bustle of modern life, who has the time for laborious maintenance routines? Hardwood staircases, with their minimal upkeep requirements, fit comfortably into busy lifestyles. A simple sweep and an occasional mop will keep them shining for yea harbour
6. The Health Dividend
A carpeted staircase might look inviting, but it can be a hotbed for allergens and pathogens. In contrast, the smooth surface of hardwood is less likely to harbour these unwelcome guests, making it a more health-conscious choice, particularly for households with children or those susceptible to allergies.
7. Versatility in Design and Safety
Adding a runner or tread rug can instantly mitigate concerns about noise or slippage on a hardwood staircase. This dual-function approach means that you don’t have to sacrifice aesthetics for safety.
8. Eco-Friendly Credentials
In an age increasingly defined by environmental consciousness, the natural origins of hardwood make it an environmentally friendly choice. While it’s essential to source responsibly to ensure sustainability, the inherent eco-friendly nature of wood offers a win-win situation.
9. Durability Par Excellence
A well-crafted hardwood staircase can withstand years of heavy traffic without losing its aesthetic or functional edge. Its remarkable durability promises not just longevity, but also sustained quality.
10. Weight and Structural Integrity
While often robust and substantial, specific hardwoods like Douglas fir and pine strike an essential balance between strength and weight, making them ideal for complex staircase structures.
Pros and Cons of Hardwood flooring
No decision, especially one as enduring as the choice of material for your staircase, should be made lightly. While hardwood offers a plethora of advantages, it’s not devoid of its own set of quirks and considerations. Whether you’re enamoured by the visual feast that is a hardwood staircase or you’re still straddling the fence of decision-making, a balanced understanding of both its virtues and limitations can illuminate your path. So, let’s unfurl the tapestry of pros and cons to help you make a well-considered choice.
- Easy Maintenance
One of hardwood’s standout features is its minimal maintenance requirement. Unlike carpeting or other soft flooring materials that may require periodic deep cleaning, hardwood only needs occasional dusting or mopping. This ease of maintenance saves both time and long-term cleaning costs.
- Aesthetic Flexibility
Hardwood is like a chameleon in the design world; it can adapt to almost any setting or aesthetic preference. Whether your home leans more towards a rustic charm or modern minimalism, hardwood can be finished and stained to match the mood.
- Health Benefits
For households with allergy concerns, hardwood is a godsend. Its solid, non-porous surface is hostile to dust mites, allergens, and other pathogens that could cause health problems. It’s much easier to clean and sanitize, ensuring a healthier living environment.
- Long-Term Value Addition
A hardwood staircase is not just a design choice; it’s an investment. Homes with hardwood features often have higher resale values. Over time, as other materials age and deteriorate, hardwood retains its timeless allure, thereby adding to the long-term value of your property.
Provided that you’re sourcing from responsible vendors, hardwood is a renewable resource. Its production has a lower carbon footprint compared to other flooring materials like tiles or carpet. Plus, old hardwood can typically be recycled or repurposed, minimizing waste.
It’s not just about how long something lasts, but also about how well it lasts. Hardwood is inherently durable, capable of withstanding heavy foot traffic and the wear and tear of daily life without losing its aesthetic appeal.
- Wide Range of Stylistic Options
Hardwood comes in various species, grains, and finishes, allowing for an enormous range of stylistic options. From the rich, dark hues of walnut to the lighter tones of birch or oak, you can customize your staircase to match your specific aesthetic tastes and needs.
- May Require Safety Adaptations
Hardwood is a beautiful but slippery material, especially when wet. If you have small children or elderly family members, or if you’re just generally concerned about safety, you may need to invest in additional safety features like anti-slip treads or stair runners.
- Initial Cost Can Be High
The upfront cost of installing a hardwood staircase can be higher than other material options like carpet or laminate. This initial expenditure, however, should be weighed against the long-term benefits, both aesthetic and financial, that hardwood offers.
- Specific Household Conditions May Necessitate Extra Considerations
While hardwood is mostly durable, it can be sensitive to fluctuations in temperature and humidity. Homes in particularly dry or humid climates may require humidifiers or dehumidifiers to maintain the wood’s integrity over the long term. Also, if you have pets with claws, be prepared for some inevitable scratching.
Choosing a staircase material is not a decision to be taken lightly; it’s an integral element that functions both practically and aesthetically within your home. Hardwood offers an attractive package of aesthetic versatility, long-term value, minimal maintenance, and health benefits. Consult your local specialists to ensure your hardwood staircase not only captures your aesthetic vision but also endures over time.
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